Intimacy Code: Broken Trust by Chidi and Victor Akunna

mr-right1_Sometime ago, we wrote that “marriage never leaves you the same”. The more we invest into this awesome relationship, the more we are convinced of how true that is. Our marriage provides an environment that stretches us, brings out the best in us and provides a rare kind of support that serves as a spring board to greater accomplishment. However, it has also challenged and exposed our deepest fears, thoughts and desires.

This points out the reason why we must handle our spouses’ information with utmost confidentiality. It is irresponsible to discuss the sensitive information your spouse shared with you or which you observed by virtue of having access to the innermost parts of his/her inner soul with people. We have seen this ruin the romance and intimacy that were hitherto enjoyed by couples.

True love covers many flaws and it is our responsibility to cover our spouses’ flaws. Sometimes, couples say to us, “my wife/husband only discusses peripheral issues with me, I don’t feel like I am a part of his/her ‘inner’ world”. When we probe further, it often turns out that they either disclosed something they shouldn’t have in the past, overreacted when their spouses were disclosing something sensitive or they have trust issues, among many others.

When love is assumed, loyalty is expected. This implies that a break in mutual trust disconnects intimacy. There is no intimacy without trust. Trust must be earned through our character and maturity. Can you be trusted with confidential information? Can you be trusted to handle delicate issues with maturity? Can you manage the information that can potentially throw you off your feet?

Take a look at your relationship/marriage, where have you lost your spouse’s trust? If it is as regards money, apologize sincerely and ask him/her how you can make things better. You may have to change your behaviour by keeping your promises, being more transparent and accountable. Finally, be patient, it takes a while to rebuild broken trust

Chidi & Victor Akunna
Romance & Intimacy Catalysts
Foundation For Family Affairs

Photo Credit: insistpost

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About the Author

ffablog
Chidi & Victor Akunna are leading voices on marital romance and family life. They are passionate about helping individuals, couples and organisations build sustainable and valuable relationships, and testimonials abound. They are authors of many articles and books. They partner in the administration of “Romance Masterclass” – a coaching programme and “Lite the FIRE” workshop – a couples’ romance makeover intervention. Together, they write “Connected Hearts” – a leading daily devotional on spicing up marital romance and strengthening families. They also oversee the operations of Foundation for Family Affairs – a charity focused on strengthening families around the globe. Feel free to enjoy the resources available here!

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