IntimacyCode: Getting him/her to open up! by Chidi and Victor AKunna

Consistent Honour: This is a continuation of the series on “how do I get my man to open up?”. We have considered confidentiality and competence, we would be taking it further today by considering consistency in respect.
 
There is what people call the law of ‘see finish’ in relationship. This is what Jesus referred to when he said that “a prophet is not without honour except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home.” There is a tendency to take someone for granted when we know their story, their flaws, and personal failures and this also applies to spouses.
 
One of the things we consciously guard against in our marriage is lowering our respect and honour for each other because of what we now know by virtue of proximity. It is amazing how this has given me the courage to be even more vulnerable and open in my marriage. Nothing ‘scares off’ a man than to see his wife’s attitude towards him degenerate after a ‘bare it all’ discussion. On the other hand, nothing ‘scares off a woman than to see her husband treating her with disdain because she disclosed an error she made in her past.
 Hence, the question here is, after the disclosure, would you still see me as your Prince in shinning armour and your Princess charming respectively? Would you turn your heart away from me because of what you now know about me?
Now, how do get your man/woman to open up? You must learn to deliberately show him/her even more respect when he/she brings you into his/her world.
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About the Author

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Chidi & Victor Akunna are leading voices on marital romance and family life. They are passionate about helping individuals, couples and organisations build sustainable and valuable relationships, and testimonials abound. They are authors of many articles and books. They partner in the administration of “Romance Masterclass” – a coaching programme and “Lite the FIRE” workshop – a couples’ romance makeover intervention. Together, they write “Connected Hearts” – a leading daily devotional on spicing up marital romance and strengthening families. They also oversee the operations of Foundation for Family Affairs – a charity focused on strengthening families around the globe. Feel free to enjoy the resources available here!

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