“I think Valentine is overrated. I often feel uncomfortable, close to the time, because my wife always expects me to get her something special. That would have been OK if she did not expect it to be expensive. She always compares what I get her with what her friend’s husband gets her and ends up nagging me about getting her something of no worth.
It’s the start of the year and I have just invested in projects that should bring huge profit about mid-year, so can’t afford an expensive gift this year. How do I manoeuvre this?” B.H.
Chidi: Interesting! Thank you for that question.
You don’t have to break the bank to make your spouse happy or feel special. What matters is that your spouse feels appreciated.
It is ideal to get your spouse a gift he/she would appreciate, but it appears that this might not be the case here as the worth rather determines the value. Howbeit, it is not too late to make her understand a few things. Sometimes, in order to achieve this, depending on who your spouse is, you may need to have a dialogue to explain what you are working on and what your family can afford at the moment. There is no need to be like the Joneses.
This emphasises the importance of having a family vision. With this in place, she would be privy to the financial goals of the family. Thus, her friend would no longer be considered a ‘competition’.
Call a meeting to discuss and chart a course for your family. Deal with her as a team player and see your marriage turn around. Hopefully, she would have a change of mind before the next four days – the 14th.
#CountdownToValentine
Chidi & Victor Akunna
Romance & Intimacy Catalysts
www.foundationforfamilyaffairs.org.
Hi dear sis & bro. Really good response. More points-🙂 (for subsequent valentine and other festive periods)
Hubby should regularly appreciate the wife, verbally and with simple unexpected gifts, not waiting for festive periods, I believe this will improve their romance and communication. Furthermore, the wife’s heart will be more open to whatever discussions hubby brings up.
Thank you so much, ma’am.
We cut off the part where he mentioned how much he does to make her happy, his concern was the anxiety he is – hopefully, was – feeling about Valentine next week.
We felt we had over-flogged that area in earlier posts, but thanks for pointing it out as those reading this as a stand-alone piece would benefit from the rich tips you shared. We appreciate you!