Walking down the aisle: “I like to be myself” syndrome by Chidi & Victor Akunna

Last time, we discussed the importance of revisiting our story of Singlehood and how the story either limits or empowers us. Today, the focus is on the little things we do that sabotage our opportunities of finding or being found by a potential spouse. Generally, you hear people say, be yourself, you don’t need to change who you are to attract the woman or the man of your dreams. This is good advice if you are presently living your best version. Life is constantly progressive and to keep succeeding, we must constantly change and adapt. If being yourself means ‘saying things the way they come to your mind’ in a bid to be ‘real’, it is little wonder that guys keep showing up and taking off through the next available exit. Many single ladies have damaged countless potential relationships while they were still at their fragile stage.

phpKOc72oPMOn the other hand, if as a guy you keep telling your date that she is fat, talks too much, laughs too much with guys, etc., you may have noticed that the only people you are attracting are people who can put up with your verbal bashing because they are already low on esteem.

The point here is this, don’t claim you are being yourself, if your present version is alienating and ruining the people you are trying to attract. We can teach you relationship principles, steps to getting found or finding a great lady, but if your attitude doesn’t improve, you would only attract, but not keep them.

What complaints have people made about you? What feedbacks do you get regularly?

Make a list and get to work. When you get better and emotionally healthy, you will end up attracting someone at your new level.
To be continued…

Photo Credit: phpKOc72oPM.jpg

Chidi & Victor Akunna
Romance & Relationship Catalysts

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About the Author

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Chidi & Victor Akunna are leading voices on marital romance and family life. They are passionate about helping individuals, couples and organisations build sustainable and valuable relationships, and testimonials abound. They are authors of many articles and books. They partner in the administration of “Romance Masterclass” – a coaching programme and “Lite the FIRE” workshop – a couples’ romance makeover intervention. Together, they write “Connected Hearts” – a leading daily devotional on spicing up marital romance and strengthening families. They also oversee the operations of Foundation for Family Affairs – a charity focused on strengthening families around the globe. Feel free to enjoy the resources available here!

4 Comments on "Walking down the aisle: “I like to be myself” syndrome by Chidi & Victor Akunna"

  1. This is awesome. Thanks… Spot on

  2. You guys bless me! You may not see the results NOW, but time will tell. Keep up the good work!

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