Fake it Till You Make It? By Victor Akunna
I remember a very close friend I had while in high school, I looked up to him on academic issues and how to comport myself. He was really quiet and for some reason, I bought into the belief that being quiet like him would make me happier and more likeable. Thus, I did all I could to suppress my vibrant, friendly personality and as a matter of fact, when I ran a personality test, the result pointed out that I was an introvert. This story can be likened to the saying “fake it till you make it“. However, from hindsight I can boldly tell you that the only way to find true happiness is being yourself. Nothing is as freeing as that!
Dr. Mike Murdock had a similar experience, he wanted so badly to be like his quiet father, every time he had the urge to talk, he would produce a small card which reminded him the importance of keeping quiet. This he did for a short while until one day, he blurted out to his mum, expressing the torment he was going through within. His wise mother said something that transformed his life, she said “well, let’s ask God to give you what to talk about”.
The moral of this story is that nobody is better than you and no personality type is better than the other. We are all built for purpose/for our assignments. There are different shoes, but they don’t all serve the same purpose. Some are used for mountain-climbing, others for sports, corporate events, some to shield you from the cold, etc. Hence, it would be unwise for a particular shoe to wish it was another.
Experiencing this pain, the pain of trying to be another person or many different persons, turned out to be a gift. I made up my mind to discover, develop and deploy myself. This freed me from trying to be like the ‘Joneses’. You can’t be a genius trying to be someone else. A copy is a copy. ‘Being and doing YOU’ frees you from long term stress.?
If you have made your own transition as well, share with us how you were able to do it, did you get help?