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“Our Romance Story” featuring Segun and Halima Akinkugbe

“Our Romance Story” featuring Segun and Halima Akinkugbe

IMG_1425FFA: Please introduce yourselves.

Our names are Olusegun and Halima Akinkugbe. We both studied law and are the Pastors of City of God Glasgow, a parish of RCCG.

FFA – Wow! What a wonderful combo… “This book of the law shall never depart from your mouth…” Lol! How long have you been married?

We celebrated our sixth wedding anniversary on 19th December 2015, so we can say six years of marital fulfilment.

FFA: Congratulations! There will be many more years of marital fulfilment! At what point did you decide to marry her? What attracted her to you?

Segun: WHEN I discovered she made me want to be a better man. She treated everyone the same way, whether big or small; no eye service, just respect for all men.

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FFA: I like that, “Respect for ALL men!” First lady, why did you decide to marry him?

Halima: It was really trust I had FOR HIM. I knew I could trust him with myself, he would not take advantage of me during courtship and the trust has grown, I can trust him with our children (travelled to Nigeria twice without the children) and I can trust him with our future.

FFA: Wow! “I could trust him with myself” – very deep. PSegs, how did you propose?

WE were talking and I just asked her. It had been building up, so I asked there and then and she eventually, on a subsequent phone conversation, said yes.

FFA: That was straight to the point, no messing about 🙂 How do you fill your romance-tank; improve intimacy; take romance to the next level?

BY talking, sharing our challenges, solving problems together, dinner, movies,… The truth is we are comfortable with each other.

FFA: Do you have family rituals/routines that bind you together?

YEAH, we watch some programs, we take the girls to certain play places and catch our fun. We have a memorial restaurant we like to go to. At times, we schedule our sex life.

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FFA: Awesome! … loving this, this is what we call “Romance Improvement Plan” 🙂

How have you been able to navigate through the challenges of each phase of your marriage?

WE ADJUST and mature, from when it was just us, to one child then two children. We watch ourselves and seek to assist in each other’s responsibilities. As the man, I have become more domesticated, she has grown in ministry.

Also we discuss and have learnt to understand each other’s manner of communication. When she’s upset it takes her time to talk, so I wait, it may be uncomfortable, but I let the conversation flow, I don’t force it.

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Halima: Same here, he can be sulky when upset, so I let it get out of his system, then we talk. Truth is we understand ourselves.

FFA: How authentic! Thank you for sharing. What advice do you have for Singles/The Engaged?

SINGLES – MAXIMIZE your singleness. Your most important relationship in singleness is your relationship with God. Discover the essence of who you are from your time with God and gain your validation from God before you go into marriage.

THE ENGAGED – Marriage is for mature people. You are only as mature as you are selfless. You will only adjust to the extent you are selfless. That sense of selflessness, living to see the other actualize his or her dream or potential is what will bring fulfilment to you, not the selfishness of putting your personal need first.

FFA: Very practical, first things first. Any encouraging words for couples going through a challenging time?

I Believe God allows us to experience challenging times so that we can admit our limitations and then learn to depend on his grace. Marriage is like a triangle God is the top point, the couple are at the bottom. As we take our eyes off each other and focus on pleasing God in the marriage, we will end up touching each other and rekindling our love.

FFA: Wow! Wow! Wow! We love the sincerity with which you shared your “Romance Story”. You both are a blessing!

To follow them and find out more about what they do, please reach them on http://www.cityofgodglasgow.net/

To get updates on “Our Romance Story” as soon as it drops, please subscribe to this blog.

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Comments (19)

  • Nworah Chinyere C Reply

    Awesome!

    January 27, 2016 at 10:00 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      @ Nworah, simply Awesome indeed, lol! *wink* Truly inspiring!

      January 28, 2016 at 12:03 am
  • Abimbola Reply

    Beautiful couple ?

    January 27, 2016 at 10:35 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      @ Abimbola, we agree with you, beautiful couple, beautiful marriage! They remind us that marriage is still beautiful, don’t they?

      January 28, 2016 at 12:06 am
  • Dan Reply

    God bless you sir! I learnt a lot from your story. I love the emphasis on “WE ADJUST”. I also love your approach towards conflict resolution with your wife. Sometimes, it seems people who are kinda introverted are complex, but they are not. You just need to know what works for them. Your marriage will continue to go from strength to strength, amen.

    January 27, 2016 at 11:25 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      Nice one @Dan, “you just need to know what works for them” and before we forget, Amen to your prayer, we claim and seal it! 🙂

      January 28, 2016 at 12:10 am
  • Gift Reply

    Thanks for your advice to the engaged. We truly need to die to self. I am sure taking that on board. @Abimbola – yes, they are beautiful?

    January 27, 2016 at 11:29 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      @ Gift, we are happy you learnt something to take on board. It is true that selfish people frustrate the natural process of blooming love!

      January 28, 2016 at 12:14 am
  • Joan Reply

    Really blessed especially the insight of these words ”I Believe God allows us to experience challenging times so that we can admit our limitations and then learn to depend on his grace. Marriage is like a triangle God is the top point, the couple are at the bottom. As we take our eyes off each other and focus on pleasing God in the marriage, we will end up touching each other and rekindling our love”
    This is so very true and I believe this is the very basis for the sustainance of any marriage worth celebrating many years! More grace to FFA!

    January 28, 2016 at 1:07 am
    • ffablog Reply

      Thank you so much @ Joan, you captured a key secret of their marital romance 🙂 *wink wink*

      January 29, 2016 at 4:44 am
  • Omo Reply

    PSegz and Halima. Beautiful people in and out. They have always been an inspiration to me and a source of encouragement. They have a beautiful relationship and their respect for each other is amazing. God bless them richly.

    January 28, 2016 at 6:11 am
    • ffablog Reply

      Amen to that prayer @ Omo, thank you. “Their respect for each other is amazing”, this is deep. The beautiful thing about their romance is that those who know them closely testify to what you just said. The wisdom tip here is that we must endeavour to live out the same ideals, in public and behind closed doors. Thanks a lot.

      January 29, 2016 at 4:50 am
  • Anonymous Reply

    @Halima – You just gave me a very practical tip on how to relate with my hubby. He sulks when he is upset and I guess my way of dealing with it has not helped much.

    January 28, 2016 at 8:55 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      @ Anonymous, lol! We are happy you got something practical to apply right away! Go girl 🙂

      January 29, 2016 at 4:52 am
  • Margaret Reply

    I have been married for 15 years now and I must say that Pastor Segun and Halima’s marriage has inspired me. This is a couple worth emulating. In most marriages today, respect for each other is lacking. FFA, keep up the good work.

    January 28, 2016 at 9:46 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      Wow!!! “I have been married for 15 years now and I must say that Pastor Segun and Halima’s marriage has inspired me” @ Margaret, you possess a fantastic teachable spirit!!! Many people with your years of experience in marriage don’t expect to learn much from younger couples. Your comment couldn’t have agreed more with D. L. Moody’s, “it is what we learn after we know it all that counts”

      January 29, 2016 at 4:59 am
  • Bukola Reply

    Very interesting. Thank you for the advise to the singles. Most of the times we are disappointed in Marriage cos we don’t get this right on time. A lady on her wedding told her husband ‘ I am not here to complete you cos you are complete in Him…’ and vice versa.

    January 28, 2016 at 9:51 pm
    • ffablog Reply

      Very true @ Bukola. When couples look to each other as their source of completion, they drain their marriage of romantic energy through their unrealistic expectations. Thus, the fact that we are complete in God must become our personal truth.

      January 29, 2016 at 5:05 am
  • Mary Reply

    God bless u both, i love your words of encouragement to singles like me “Maximize your singleness”

    February 24, 2016 at 2:40 pm

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